The Mitchieville Gun Club Meet and Greet

A little while back I introduced you to the founding members of the Mitchieville Gun Club. We had an informal meet and greet at The Manor on the weekend before hitting the ranges for an afternoon shoot.  The Mayor was pleased to see so many new members that I swear he almost cried.  The last time I saw The Mayor cry was when we rented Old Yeller.  The Mayor gets all weepy when Travis shoots Old Yeller.  Damn dog should’ve listened. Here’s our newest members:


OMMAG likes guns.  OMMAG likes to buy guns.  OMMAG like to buy lots and lots of guns.  OMMAG then likes to mount the newly purchased  guns on his living room wall to spook the couple that just moved in from Newfoundland across the street.  OMMAG likes to BBQ the animals he slays with his many guns.  The City of Winnipeg wishes OMMAG wouldn’t hunt at the municipal zoo.


Logan is a solitary lad who survives the mean streets of San Francisco with a small collection of hand guns and 12 a gauge shot gun.  Afraid to leave the safety of his one bedroom basement apartment, Logan passes time by cleaning his kitchen over and over and over again.  Seriously, what kind of single guy keeps a kitchen that clean and maintains such high personal standard of personal grooming? Weird.


This is Ice Princess and her hubby Dark Blue Tory with their two kids (and number three on the way).  They live well north of the urban sprawl that is Toronto because they think they are better than everyone else.  DBT believes in teaching his kids how to handle guns at a small age incase Pierre Trudeau comes back as a zombie and runs against Stephen Harper in the next election.


I really shouldn’t brag, but this is me with my new squeeze.  We met about a month ago at a quiet little gun range just North of  Mitchieville Township and love blossomed.  We moved in together over the weekend and everything is sex, guns, working out, and more sex.   Being a physical fitness man like I am, I appreciate her slender physique and athletic build. I make the meals, she polishes the gun.  Does it get any better than this?


Good old Dmorris is a kindly old fellow. When he isn’t out walking Poochie or volunteering at the local mall community services counter he can be seen taking pot-shots at the local skate board freaks.  ‘Crazy Old Man Morris’ is what they call him.  Some of his bingo buddies call him ‘One Nut Morris’  but that story is for another day. Let’s leave Dmorris be so he can get a nap in before lunch time.


Frank from Purple Tory is a handsome young rouge is he not?  When not at school at some privileged East-Coast university, Frank bides his time in Kingston in his job as a "Historical Re-enactment  Entertainer" at Old Fort Henry.  Having little kids wipe ice cream on his scarlet tunic makes Frank angry and at night he takes his frustrations out on the many parolees Corrections Canada lets out every day. Hey Frank, what’s in the pizza boxes?

5-400 When MUGS  isn’t on the hammers or taking pictures of nekkid women at his "private" home photo studio he can be seen hunting on his property.  I see he even has two dogs and a bitch to keep him company.  I suppose I shouldn’t make *BITCH* jokes here as it appears that Mrs. Mugs can handle a piece.  A small piece to be sure but what does MUGS care, he’s happy as long as she’s happy. Now go fetch some critters for supper MUGS!



Todd is your typical Aussie punk-ass lay about with a chip on his shoulder.  With his trashy American girlfriend and disturbingly small handgun Todd wastes away the days in a drug fuelled haze of self hate and loathing.  Dirt poor, his "Sheila" makes low cost clothing for the Thai-boys who live across the hall. For entertainment Todd watches Yahoo Serious DVD’s on a stolen 10 inch TV.


ENIG-MAC is a man’s man if there every was one.  Rugged, good looking and one hell of a shot.  Not only did he shoot the animals mounted on his wall, he gutted them, carried them down a BC mountain, and then jogged back into Vancouver with the stags on his back.   In his spare time, Enig-Mac teaches fire arm safety at the local Public Library and volunteers at the local used battery depot.  Enig-Mac – what a guy!

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