On the Campaign Trail

If it seems like the citizens of Mitchieville line up at the election booth frequently, well, you’d be right. But a chance to overthrow that Mayor who usurped me in the last election should be an occasion to riot in the streets.

Let us have a look at what the Mayor has done for you lately. Just this past weekend, he flew off to New Orleans, effectively ignoring the flooding in his own town that was caused by an explosion of an old watermain. He has raised taxes and increased the photocopy budget at city hall. He has banned smoking in public and private establishments. The roads are nearly as pothole ridden as those in London Ontario; apparently, new office furniture is more important than the alignment of your vehicle. He was filmed by the National Enquirer hiding in the washroom of the hotel where his mistress is staying.

I could go on at great length, but we all know it’s time for the Mayor to go. The time has come to focus on the broken window fallacy.

The money that is taken from your pocket to fund the Mayor’s pet projects is money you do not have to spend on yourself and your family. Let us get selfish here and look at the reality of the situation. The streets are crumbling, the garbage is piling, the collective farms are yielding little food, and the town square is a shrine to the current corrupt Mayor. The price of gas continues to rise along with the temperature. What has the Mayor done for you lately?

As I begin my campaign for Mayor of Mitchieville, complete with a pounding headache, I am pleased to announce my campaign manager is none other than the infinitely talented dmorris, a proven mathematician at election times. He is a force to be reckoned with and brings a lot of cash to my campaign. He gets a gas guzzling truck, free gasoline for a year, and food from my kitchen, and power in exchange for his support.

Other important announcements are coming soon. Stay tuned. I, Lisa, care about your hard earned cash more than Fenris and the soon to be former Mayor combined. I wear black leather fiscal boots.

Vote for Lisa Foggy on October 14th. Vote for change you can believe in. If you doubt it, you will be crushed.

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