Failure Is Not An Option

A new approach to edumacation in Knoxville, Tennessee, means that students will no longer be allowed to get zero’s. Yup, no more zero’s, everyone is a hero:

Schools such as Powell, Gresham and Northwest middle schools are providing time in the school day during which, if students have gotten a zero or turned in incomplete work, they can get help from a teacher and make it up. This gives them another opportunity to master the work.

“That has boosted their academic achievement,” said Elizabeth Alves, Knox County Schools director of middle schools.

The grading approach is designed to allow students to own, not escape, responsibility, Alves said.

“There are a lot of kids that just aren’t turning in work, and they take zeros,” she said. “Several schools have said that’s not OK.”

I know most of you are thinking this is a great idea, failure is not an option, no matter how miserable the students’ grades are. But let’s say a student turns in work but it is totally craptastic, does that student deserve an actual bad grade? Haha, don’t be silly:

Besides allowing make-up time during the day, Bearden Middle School officials also are trying a controversial grading policy that ensures students can’t receive a grade below a 60. So, for example, where a failing student might in the past have scored a 10, 20 or 30, under the new method they’re ensured of getting at least a 60.

Such a mark is still considered failing. But under the new scale, the student isn’t penalized nearly as much for a poor mark when that is averaged with other, presumably improved work, said Bearden Middle assistant principal David Bailey.

“For those kids who are doing the work and are really trying … they can’t recover from a zero, but they can recover from a 60,” he said. “It gives them hope.”

Many of you might be thinking that if a student is trying really hard and doing the work, why would they be getting a zero in the first place? I’m here to tell you that I don’t appreciate that line of questioning, it’s as if you’re being cynical or something.

If you’re curious as to how this type of educational welfare will affect a child later in life, fear not. You may think this culture of low expectations might affect a childs future, but you would be wrong. You see, if a child hands in assignments late, or incomplete, or not at all, it actually guarantees himself/herself many things in life. How? Simple. Now that the child is pretty much deemed semi-retarded, he/she will receive free college/university tuition under the guise of being a disadvantaged youth. A few years after college, where they will receive more 60’s (wink wink), they are secured a government job or welfare (although those two are interchangeable). Which means, they will have no real education or money, therefore, they qualify for a sub-prime loan.

It’s the children that work hard and obey the rules that are fucked. After all, in future years, they will be the ones who these dunces will be leeching off.

Remember, there is no such thing as creeping socialism

3 Responses to “Failure Is Not An Option”

  1. Sisyphus Says:

    No more “zeros.”

  2. Jon Says:

    So these pillars of society aren’t turning in work and yet they’re able to take time later to do it and still get more than 50%? Whereas you have some student who tried very hard and turned their work in on time and maybe earned their 60% or 70%…where’s the fairness for them? Should they not just get a 100% for turning in on time?

  3. The Mayor Says:

    The ability-people get no extra marks because they aren’t disenfranchised. Only the slovenly will be rewarded.

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