Man Caught With His Testicles In A Jar
When Newscastle police spotted a man parked in a no-stopping zone, they thought they saw him doing something with his hands that indicated he might have a weapon. The man did indeed have a weapon in his hand, but not the kind the coppers expected:
Police drew their weapons when they suspected Keith Roy Weatherley, 46, was armed.
Instead, they found him partially clothed with his genitals in a jar, a police statement said.
Weatherley saw the police and drove away, despite them flashing their lights.
The chase lasted five to 10 minutes, with a top speed of just 20 kmh, before Weatherley was stopped at Centenary Drive, Newcastle. He refused to leave the car.
Four officers used batons and capsicum spray to remove him.
They found a 750-millilitre jar around his penis and noted that Weatherley attempted to continue “pleasuring himself in between bouts of wrestling”.
A search of his car uncovered pornography, a home-made sex aid, women’s stockings and a Jack Russell terrier.
This guy is one serious masturbater. As a matter of fact, he’s the kind of guy that takes the cake, and then sticks his cock in it. If they had a Fantasy Masturbater League, just like they have a Fantasy Football league, this guy would be Ladainian Tomlinson. The visual of this is outstanding. He’s got a face full of pepper spray and four officers beating him with clubs, yet he still manages to pull his pud in between the thrashings. I’m not so sure they should have even arrrested him, the guy’s kind of a hero really. As for the Jack Russell? Well that’s just weird.
And it all happened at Nobby beach. Go figure.