George Bush Can’t Understand a Simple Book

Keyser was gratified to learn recently that the Command-in-Chief of the Free World not only reads a lot, but he reads not just mysteries but histories, and not only does he read them, but takes away lots of lessons from them. One would have thought that he wouldn’t have a lot of spare time on his hands as he destroys the free market in the process of “saving” it (perhaps he misremembered that “they make a desert and calling it peace” thing from his extensive readings). On the other hand, presumably a lot of this work can be done through delegation (“Sky’s the limit, Paul!” “Henry, sir.” “Henry.”) and so the Socialist-in-Chief can indulge his penchant for book learnin’. Unfortunately, it would appear that the histories are in fact mysteries to the Comforter-in-Chief:

Well, sometimes books are just to escape, like mysteries, and it’s just a chance to get your mind off the moment. Sometimes I read books to — a lot of history books, and I can take lessons away from the books — like Abraham Lincoln. I just finished James McPherson’s book on Abraham Lincoln and his relationship with his generals, which is an interesting topic for a Commander-in-Chief. One of the lessons of Abraham Lincoln that all Presidents ought to understand, particularly at times of war, is that the President must pay attention to the troops. And Lincoln went out of his way to be with the sergeants and the enlisted personnel as well as the generals, and he — you know, he visited the wounded a lot and he visited with widows a lot.

And it’s a good lesson for any President. And the lesson is, pay attention to your military, and work with your military, and show your military that you care for them. And you go to a hospital and see these wounded kids and word gets out all across the — you know, all across the system, where — and I’ve met with a lot of the families of the fallen, which is my duty, but I think the troops appreciate that, that the President cares enough about their comrades’ families that he would meet with them. And, yes, it’s an interesting experience to do that. The Comforter-in-Chief is the person who usually gets comforted.

As frequent readers of the Lair will recall, a few weeks ago, Keyser himself actually reviewed this MacPherson book that the latter-day Lincoln cites. Sad to say, if what he says appeared on a student’s work, Keyser would feel compelled to annotate, “You didn’t really read this book, did you?” Even sadder to say, the Great-Unable-to-Read-a-Book-and-Get-the-Point-in-Chief has no reason to fib about this, so presumably this drivel shows what he got out of a book characterized by your humble blogger as follows: “Basically, it’s aimed at a fairly general audience, and is a breezy read. It’s okay overall given its comparatively limited aims.” Apparently, if the book’s “comparatively limited aims” had included conveying its message to the Commander-in-Chief of the Free World, MacPherson should have written shorter sentences and made the point even more obvious, as that Idiot-in-the-White-House-in-Chief completely missed it.

If memory serves, there may be an idle reference to Lincoln going to hospitals, and there is one story about a letter he wrote to a widow (mentioned because it was published in a local newspaper and then republished across the country, so it was of political importance). But that was most certainly not the point of the book (it was just a very subordinate element). Indeed, the lesson to ” pay attention to your military, and work with your military” is entirely fucking wrong. It’s almost as if this imbecile went out of his way to ignore the entire theme of the whole goddamned book!

MacPherson belabors the point that in his interpretation, Lincoln taught himself military strategy and had a very difficult time finding generals – both for the army as a whole and as operational commanders of the broad campaigns – who could both coordinate their actions to overcome the shorter lines of communications enjoyed by the Confederates and act decisively in the field to pin down and destroy the enemy forces. MacPherson goes on at great length to show Lincoln’s difficulties in getting McClellan to get his feckless ass moving at all and the problem he encountered in finding a suitable replacement until Grant proved to be willing and able to shed the blood necessary to grind the Confederates down (with the capable help of Sherman and Sheridan).

The major thrust of the book was not that Lincoln was the Comforter-in-Chief. Rather, he took an active role in determining effective military policy himself and actively attempted to cajole the generals to get on with it. Furthermore, the book also emphasizes how military activity in a democracy is a fundamentally political act, so that Lincoln constantly thought about obtaining and maintaining support for the prosecution of the war, guided his public pronouncements on the conduct of the war with this in mind, and even at times determined immediate operational policy with an eye towards maintaining Republican control of Congress (and himself as president) since in his mind this was the only way that the war could be won.

Do we think that Bush had any idea of how to conduct the war or said anything but “Hey, Donald, can you win this thing?” And has he opened his mouth once in the past four years to indicate to the public what the fuck the US is in Iraq for at all, or what the military objectives are, or whether these were being obtained, or, in short, why the public should support the war? No, he hasn’t done any of that. He’s apparently too mental lazy or incompetent to understand what happened in a similar situation in the past when someone else takes the trouble to explain things for him in pretty simple terms. So it’s small wonder that he shows not the least understanding of how to guide the war in Iraq. Not to mention the monstrously misguided efforts to buy our way back to prosperity (after a financial meltdown caused in part by his own ridiculous policies as a “compassionate conservative”).

Keyser’s got bad feelings about the upcoming administration of Franklin Delanobama, but it’s not like he could do much worse than his feeble-minded predecessor.

[This enemy transmission was deciphered used an Enigma machine pilfered over at Keyser's Lair.]

One Response to “George Bush Can’t Understand a Simple Book”

  1. Sisyphus Says:

    “I’ve abandoned free-market principles to save the free-market system.”

    The marks on my forehead are from me slamming it against my keyboard over and overrrrrrrrttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt

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