UN Official Calls For Ban On Plastic Bags

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A top UN official has called for a worldwide ban on plastic bags:

“Single-use plastic bags which choke marine life should be banned or phased out rapidly everywhere,” said Achim Steiner, head of the U.N. Environment Program, according to McClatchy Newspapers. “There is simply zero justification for manufacturing them any more, anywhere.”

After Achim Steiner told the conference that plastic bags were bad for the environment, he sat down in his richly padded Italian leather chair, loosened the Salvatore Ferragamo five-fold, silk tie that adorned his Egyptian cotton Eton Diamond Shirt, and slowly poured some Japanese mineral water into his Oenophilia stemware. He then got up and walked out to his chauffer-driven Mercedes Mclaren SLR which took him to his private jet which flew him back to his 4800 sq. ft villa in Bordeaux.

From there, Steiner entered his villa, hugged his life partner, and when asked how the conference went, exclaimed, “Hopefully I got through to those bastards that plastic bags are killing  the environment!”

One Response to “UN Official Calls For Ban On Plastic Bags”

  1. Professor Bob Says:

    Mr. Mayor,
    These are the clowns that make my blood boil. They are so self centered that they cannot see the harm they do.
    GD talking heads.
    Prof Bob

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