Soccer – Wake Me When It’s Over
Is anyone in Mitchieville interested in the World Cup? Ya, me neither. What a completely useless sport soccer is. Sure, I understand if you grew up and your folks didn’t have any money, or you immigrated here from one of those terribly smelly countries, that you are probably interested in soccer, but as for The Mayor – I can’t wrap my head around any sport where there is absolutely NO ACTION EVER. EVA!!!
Nothing EVER happens in soccer. It’s like 90 minutes of watching fruity dudes who fall down a lot after nothing happened to them, chase a ball that they most likely won’t even try to score with, and then congratulate each other for doing ZIPPO. And then the game ends 0-0. Three shots on goal for one team and four for the other, and the announcer says, “what a thrilling and entertaining game”.
Plus, is there some sort of rule in soccer that if you want to play you have to have extremely greasy hair?
I know there will be some of you that are probably offended that The Mayor just insulted soccer. Think about how The Mayor feels for a second. I use to think you were cool. Now I hear you like watching greasy, fruity dudes who fall down a lot. Ya, feel my pain for a second. Unlike soccer players, I have actual, real pain.
**The Daily What provided the pic