Ikea Cakes Found To Contain Fecal Matter

Ikea has recalled a whack of their Taarta Chokladkrokant cakes (Aka Poopenfloppen) after Chinese authorities found traces of shit in them:

The Swedish-made cakes had failed tests “for containing an excessive level of coliform bacteria, according to the General Administration of Quality Supervision, Inspection and Quarantine,” the Shanghai Daily website wrote.

Ikea said 1,800 Taarta Chokladkrokant cakes — described on its website as an almond cake with chocolate, butter cream and butterscotch — were destroyed in December after being intercepted by Chinese customs.

The almond and butter cream tasted pretty good, but the chocolate tasted kind of crappy.

A good rule of thumb when shopping at a furniture store is to always avoid the food aisle. The Mayor knows it’s tempting to throw in a package of Poopenfloppen cakes with your Billy Bookcase, but if you think about it, you should always buy food at grocery stores and furniture at furniture stores, and never the two shall mix.

First it was horse meat in Ikea’s meatballs, and then horse meat in their hot dogs, and now they found shit in their cakes. Those eggs they serve with their .99 cent breakfast have been looking a little suspect as of late, The Mayor wonders if they contain traces of pigeon brain? Well, don’t worry, even if they do, it’s probably not that bad for you. Eat up, sucker.

As for the Chinese banning the Poopenfloppen cakes, The Mayor had to read the article seven times just to get it in his head that the Chinese were actually banning products and not the other way around. It seems the Chinese have no problem exporting crud-filled foods, but when it comes to adding a little fecal matter into their diet, that’s where the buck stops.

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