Tasers performing better than expected!
From our beloved CBC, it turns out that Tasers are actually conducting up to 50% more current than previously advertised. I for one welcome the news as a sign of innovation in product development.
As the technical support team here in Mitchieville, I have had the misfortune to test many underperforming products, from dodgy little Priuses to massage parlour attendants who turned out to be dudes. We are constantly being marketed shoddy products from all over, and this struggling company out of Arizona with barely any name recognition is being unscrupluously maligned.
Police forces across North America assure people that Tasers are safe. The manufacturer, Taser International, has said its product has a higher safety margin than Tylenol.
That’s right. You ever try throwing a handful of Tylenol at an assailant? It only gets him or her angrier. That’s not a formula for safety, people.
This post will be followed up tomorrow with a brief 45 minute phone survey…
December 4th, 2008 at 11:50 pm
Tasers should be banned because might actually cause discomfort to the criminal.
December 5th, 2008 at 4:16 am
Actually, I loaded up the hopper of my high-capacity paintball gun with Tylenol. They put a serious move on. Gotta be couple a hundred feet per sec muzzel velocity. ‘Cept, just make sure you use the caplets, cause the old white one tend to powder up a bit when they hit. Caplets give you much better penetration.
December 5th, 2008 at 5:03 am
I don’t want to mess up on this, Steve, you’re saying no to the gel caps or yes to the gel caps?
December 5th, 2008 at 5:06 am
My comment seems to be lost from last night, but here goes again…
Unlike Sys, who cares an awful lot for the marginalized of our society, I don’t mind if tasers are actually conducting up to 7000% more current than previously advertised. That’s the real definition of a shocker.
December 5th, 2008 at 8:11 am
I thought the real definition of a shocker was your ring finger retracted.
December 5th, 2008 at 9:21 am
No, I think what you’re describing is the Idaho Wrangler.
December 5th, 2008 at 9:29 am
Digging for more than potatoes, it seems.