City under siege — Day 3
Thursday, February 4th, 2010
The citizens are in their usual state of panic, just as City Council wants them. Supplies of red mittens are running low, as the last of the free tickets to events have been sold online. People are frantically scraping the sides of their freezers for the precious ice particles, hoping that they won’t have to truck in any further snow. The homeless are huddled around a pile of burning Miga dolls, frantically trying to keep warm and cook their crack to a toasty golden brown.
We’re a destitute bunch, and the invasion force has not even arrived. We stand vigilant, gritting our teeth in the knowledge that our fragile bodies will be subject to the most violent of deluges. Crashing bodies hurling into us, so utterly devoid of mercy or even reason that they threaten to fracture our bones to powder. It’s not a SkyTrain; it’s a high-speed coffin delivering us straight into the gullet of hell.
For those of us who don’t thirst for the blood of our enemies gushing down our throats, we steel our genitals to face the horror of the desecration of the fair athlete:
Vonn is first a GREAT athlete, but she also represents norm of feminine attractiveness. The combination of athleticism and attractiveness make Vonn the likely poster girl of the US Olympic Team, and the media hasn’t disappointed in constructed her as such.
Not to be left out, Sports Illustrated is featuring Vonn on their Feb. 8, 2010 cover. For those of you who follow SI Covers, know that female athletes are RARELY featured on the cover.
This quote comes from the website WomenTalkSports, and apparently they don’t talk to all that so good-like. (I have my own mishaps with editing, admittedly, and maybe I am being fussy by counting “media” as plural, but oh my goodness.) The women female writers are upset that on that rare occasion when a woman is featured on the cover that she is posed “provocatively.” The only way that pose is provocative is if she positions herself over the salad bar.
Maybe only 4% of the covers featured women, but 100% of the Swimsuit Edition covers featured women. What is up with that? It’s like…I dunno…SI is just interested in catering to the massive demographic that reads the magazine or something!
It’s all we can do to stave off the creeping madness, clawing into our already fragile minds and destroying our souls. We say a silent prayer for Lindsey Vonn, the latest fatality in the Olympic onslaught.











