Archive for the ‘Cake Week’ Category

Cake Week

Friday, May 13th, 2011

If The Mayor was asked to rate Cake Week between 1 – 10, The Mayor would have to say yes. Those are his true feelings, there’s no hitting the delete button now.

A “You’re Adopted” cake seems kind of harsh when you look at it on the surface, but when delivered by a cat who looks as if it’s about to break out laughing, well, that’s outstanding. Truth be told, it probably makes being adopted fun. The Mayor now wishes he was adopted. Just so he can have a laughing cat deliver him tragic news.

Now is a good time to end Cake Week. If Cake Week were a horse we would have shot it by now.

Cake Week

Thursday, May 12th, 2011

Herpes? How will that affect my chlamydia?

Yaaaaaa, Cake Week is going well, eh?

Cake Week

Wednesday, May 11th, 2011

There’s a messaged cake that doesn’t beat around the bush.

If you were to ask The Mayor how he thought Cake Week was going so far, he would say it’s going pretty sweet.

Haha, “pretty sweet.”

That’s funny because cakes can be sweet.

I really hate having to explain these gems I’m tossin’ at ya.

Cake Week

Tuesday, May 10th, 2011

Put it this way, if you go back for seconds, you’re gay.

Cake Week

Monday, May 9th, 2011

The first time we ran Cake Week around these parts, it was a monstrous success. Of course, that’s only if you gauge a massive success by the lack of comments, input and interest. If you do, then you will agree with The Mayor that Cake Week 1 was a massive success.

And since Cake Week 1 was a massive success, The Mayor brings to you Cake Week Deux. And look, it’s a cake woman pushing a cake baby out of her cakish vagina. I betcha the cake baby tastes sweet.

Cake Week

Friday, July 2nd, 2010

I’m sure the person that ordered this cake gave these verbal instructions:

Best Wishes Suzanne

Underneath that, We Will Miss You

It’s obvious to The Mayor that the government has nationalized the cake writing industry.

Cake Week

Thursday, July 1st, 2010

I want my baby back riiiiiiibssssss.

I gotta be straight out honest with you – that child looks delicious.

I’m not sure I would want to dig into the diaper portion of the cake, but some peoples are HUGE chocolate fans. I’m pretty sure that’s chocolate in their. Hmmmmm…..

Cake Week

Wednesday, June 30th, 2010

Have you noticed that lately cakes have become the new Hallmark Cards? If you have something to say, say it on a cake. A card just won’t do. Cards are so00000 2008, saying your message on a cake is very *now*, it’s very progressive.

One day cakes will become outdated forms of speech and I’m sure something else will their place. Like tattooing your message on a hobo’s back, or spray-painting it on an orphans face.

For now, I’ll take the delicious word of cakes. I hope this craze never ends.

Hey, you know who else likes cake with writin’s on ‘em? Andy from Andy’s Redneck Ramblings.

Also, Andy will be taking over the reigns of MENSA Teaser starting tomorrow and continuing for the next 77 weeks. Make sure to show up and play along. You’ll be a better person for it, because let’s face it, as it stands, well, you know where I’m going with this.

Cake Week

Tuesday, June 29th, 2010

I suppose that in the Oprah/Springer/Ellen/You Go Girl® world we live in, this kind of cake is a regular chuckle-farm to some peoples. The Mayor isn’t one of those peoples. I don’t like the way the bride is treating the groom, it reeks of assault. The Mayor won’t be a party to it. I’m sorry you had to see this.

Cake Week

Monday, June 28th, 2010

TLDG loves all the cake related shows on TV – Ace of Cakes, The Cake Boss, The Ultimate Food Challenge, etc. But The Mayor isn’t a big fan of those shows, as I find the lack of nudity off-putting. However, if the participants of these shows ever start spreading fondant with their various extremities, well then, I’d have to revisit my thoughts on the whole subject.

For now though, The Mayor isn’t a fan. I do, however, dig the cake in the picture above. Natural childbirth is a beautiful thing. And from the look of it, there will be no cesarean section on that Devil’s food cake today!