Archive for the ‘Halle Berry’ Category

Hory Crap, Darcey Was On Sun TV

Monday, October 24th, 2011

It’s good to see Darcey oot and aboot. Go over to his place and harass him. DMorris seems to enjoy doing it.

**BTW – Darcey is Mitchieville’s new Minister of Diversity. Lucky fella, he is.

Halle Berry Nose Racism

Tuesday, October 23rd, 2007

Halle Berry is in hot water (from who I’m not sure) for an anti-Semitic remark she made on The Tonight Show Friday afternoon:

The Oscar-winning star, on the show to promote her movie “Things We Lost in the Fire,” was showing Leno and his audience images of herself on her computer using the Mac program Photo Booth, which distorts images like a carnival fun-house mirror.

According to one audience member, “She introduced the first photo by saying, ‘Here’s where I look like my Jewish cousin!’ – it was a picture of her with a huge, distorted nose. No one laughed, and Jay nervously said, ‘I’m glad you said that and not me.’ When the show aired, they cut out her ‘Jewish’ comment and added a laugh track to the bit.”

I’m sure Diversity Councillors were dispatched to the studio immediately.

For the record, I don’t think Halle Berry is racist, I just think she’s an idiot. Saying that Jews have big noses isn’t racist, it’s as silly as thinking that a DJ making a joke about black women having nappy hair is racist. That’s plain silly.

I work with quite a few Jews day in and day out, and it’s true they have big noses, love Camero’s and most of them work in construction. Hold on, maybe those guys are Italian. That explains all the pasta dishes in the caf.

Besides, you know the rule: Non-white people can’t be racist. I think the Bible backs me up on that. Although, Halle is half white…so maybe she’s just half a racist.

Halle Berry–Not racist, just inappropriate.

Halle Berry Receives Racist Death Threats

Thursday, September 27th, 2007

At least that’s what every article I read on this says–Halle Berry received racist death threats–well, this may or may not be true. Read on…

Halle Berry has received racist death threats to her unborn baby.

The Oscar-winning beauty – who recently announced she was expecting her first child with boyfriend Gabriel Aubry – has been forced to hire security guards after allegedly receiving several disturbing letters from an anonymous writer.

One note warned she and her child would be “cut into hundreds of pieces”.

The rest of the article goes on to talk about Halle’s pregnancy and how much she loves to get foot rubs. Wow, Halle Berry likes foot rubs? Stop the presses, let’s run with it!

So, the article says that Halle received racist death threats, then goes on to not mention the *race* part of the equation. There are a few possibilities why they didn’t mention it, let’s have a boo at my list:

  1. It never happened
  2. It happened but every paper forgot to tell that specific detail
  3. It never happened

This wouldn’t be the first time that Halle has drudged up the ole racism buggaboo. I even remember Halle wishing she was white for a spell. However, the point is that someone made racist threats against Halle and that’s not right. Or someone didn’t. Whichever.

Halle Berry-America is Still Racist

Tuesday, May 23rd, 2006

For a woman that has no details about how she has been discriminated against, Halle Berry sure is a whiny bitch:

“Every day I wake up with this brown skin. I don’t care how much money I have, I don’t care how many movies I do, how many awards I have on my shelf, every day I am still aware that I am a woman of colour in this country and there is still certain discrimination that goes along with that, and that does not change. “No amount of money and awards changes that. What changes discrimination is the consciousness of people. I do see that changing gradually, but are we there? “I do not think that we live in a colour-blind society, where racism is null and void – that is pretty absurd. “But I believe that it is possible that things are moving in that direction, and I believe that one day, colour and race won’t matter. “I hope I am here to see it, but it hasn’t happened yet.”

I hope Halle Berry is right, I hope that one day that black women like her won’t be so racist.

Is there discrimination in America? Sure there is. Is Halle Berry and other black people racist? Sure they are. Are there some white racists? Yup. Are there Latino racists? You betcha. Are some Orientals racist? Certainly. Are there some Native Americans that are racist? You bet your life there is.

The point here is not so much to show that racism is everywhere, it’s to show that Halle Berry thinks we’re all a bunch of fucking idiots who look out of rose coloured glasses.

Halle Berry is a super-rich black woman who made it big in Hollyweird because of the good nature of white folks. Black people didn’t make her famous, rich racists made her famous. Rich, white racists go to her movie and pay $13 to see her *act*, rich racists made bitch famous. She’d be smart to realize that and shut her stupid yap long enough to thank the Lord about how well she has been treated, and how far America has come over the past 30 years.

Cry me a river, Halle, you rich fool.

Halle Berry-Not happy unless she’s crying

Halle Berry Wished She Was White

Thursday, April 20th, 2006

Some people just aren’t comfortable in their own skin. While others are only comfortable getting under people’s skin. Snap:

Halle Berry used to pray she would be “cured” of being black. The stunning actress dreamed of finding a pill to turn her skin white when she was a child, according to The Sun newspaper.

“Being a black woman I’ve struggled with that my whole life – feeling that if I changed, my life would be better.”

Awwww, sweetheart, trust me, you do not want to be white. Nowadays you’re better off being from the planet Neptune than being white. Being white means that every other skin colour hates you because they perceive you as being privileged. Even if you eat dirt soup and live in a dumpster, people of colour will look at you and say, “Look at that fucking white asshole with his expensive spoon living in the dumpster behind the best restaurant…he must know people”.

I know Halle wants some white in her, so I’d like to tell her that I can help. Come over to The Manor tonight, Halle, and I’ll put as much white in you as you can handle.

Whitey sucks, I wish I was orange

Who will be the next Bond girl

Tuesday, October 18th, 2005

I was talking to Emily yesterday, and she inspired me to come up with the idea to paste on the pages of Mitchieville who I think should be the next Bond girl.

Here’s what Emily said that got me thinking, “I was talking to the GIRL that JAMES goes out with, and she told me that if I wanted to save for the future, I should buy a BOND”.

Reading between the lines it’s obvious that Emily wants me to post a different girl between now and Friday who I think should be considered to be the next Bond girl.

Yesterday it was Angelina Jolie, and today it is Halle Berry.

Bond girls have to have a certain mean streak, a certain anger about them. Men relish anger and meanness, it’s all part of the male fantasy to have a whore in the bedroom and a virgin on your arm(or something like that, I can’t remember exactly how that saying goes). Halle Berry can pull this off.

She looks like a woman who can be the sweetest thing in the world, a woman who would be faithful to you, but then again she can also look like a mean, angry vixen. I likey that, I likey that alot. I likey the two faces of Halle Berry, and so do you, you’re only human for God’s sake.

Halle is certainly sexy enough to be a Bond girl, she’s also nearly sexy enough to be The Mayor’s girl, if it wasn’t for the fact that I prefer little blonde hair Danish girls. Maybe if the little blonde Danish girl didn’t mind Halle Berry hanging around the Manor I could accomplish both with one fell swoop. I’m rambling now, I’m kind of caught up in a fantasy, you’ll have to excuse me.

Yup, Halle Berry is the shit. Any normal man would fill her out faster than a welfare recipient fills out a claim. Halle Berry as a Bond girl you say? Yes, Halle Berry as a Bond girl I say.