Archive for the ‘Lawsuits’ Category

Dennis Kucinich Sues House Cafeteria Over Olive Pit

Thursday, January 27th, 2011

Representative Dennis Kucinich – mental deviant, Ohio – is suing the company that supplies the Longworth House Office building cafeteria for $150,000, after he cracked a tooth after biting into a pitted olive sandwich:

The incident happened over 3 years ago when he purchased the sandwich from a cafeteria at the Longworth House Office building. The sandwich was advertised as containing pitted olives that had the hard olive seeds removed. Upon biting into the sandwich, Kucinich claimed the sandwich caused him “serious and permanent dental and oral injuries” that required “multiple surgical and dental procedures.”

The congressman is now suing the company that runs the cafeteria for $150,000 in damages.

Kucinich’s lawsuit also claims he “sustained other damages,” including “significant pain, suffering and loss of enjoyment.”

The Mayor heard that Kucinich has been banned from “Pumpkin Night” at Appleby’s for obvious reasons (if that isn’t obvious, pumpkins have many large, hard seeds. Unless the seeds are baked, then they are soft and quite delicious).

I actually feel sorry for Dennis Kucinich, and not because he’s a raving lunatic, but rather because breaking a tooth is the pits. And if there’s a kernel of truth in this story, then I suppose he’s entitled to his money. Maybe not the whole $150,000, but at least a little seed money. And I’m sure there is a grain of truth to this, and even though Kucinich is a nut, and his buds probably egged him on into this lawsuit, I’d say he has a berry good chance of winning. Mind you, Kucinich first has to produce his evidence, harvest the information correctly in order to yield favourable results. If he does all that, the fruits of his labour will come home in spades.

Thanks, DMV

Tuesday, January 11th, 2011

The Mayor can honestly say that until he saw this letter, he never knew there was a “Special Plates Review Committee” at the DMV.

Betcha the pensions are redonkulous.

A Response From The Cleveland Browns

Friday, January 7th, 2011

From Deadspin —–>  In 1974, a Clevelander wrote the Browns complaining of the menace posed by the then-fad of throwing paper airplanes, and implicitly threatened litigation. The Browns’ response is just about the most awesome thing ever committed to paper.

And here’s the response:

The Greatest Letter Ever Printed On NFL Team Letterhead

That’s funny, right? You have to tell me because I plum forgot what humour is again.

**Thanks to Deadspin for this and that

The Democratic Party Has Become The Lawyers’ Party

Monday, November 30th, 2009

Greg at American Energy Crisis got an email from his buddy the other day, and decided to share it with his readers. I thought you would get a kick out of it, too, so here goes:

This is very interesting! I never thought about it this way.
The Democratic Party has become the Lawyers’ Party.
* Barack Obama is a lawyer.
* Michelle Obama is a lawyer.
* Hillary Clinton is a lawyer.
* Bill Clinton is a lawyer.
* John Edwards is a lawyer.
* Elizabeth Edwards is a lawyer.
Every Democrat nominee since 1984 went to law school (although Gore did not graduate).
Every Democrat vice presidential nominee since 1976, except for Lloyd Bentsen, went to law school.
Look at leaders of the Democrat Party in Congress:
* Harry Reid is a lawyer.
* Nancy Pelosi is a lawyer.
The Republican Party is different.
* President Bush is a businessman.
* Vice President Cheney is a businessman.
The leaders of the Republican Revolution:
* Newt Gingrich was a history professor.
*Tom Delay was an exterminator.
* Dick Armey was an economist.
* House Minority Leader Boehner was a plastic manufacturer.
* The former Senate Majority Leader Bill Frist is a heart surgeon.
Who was the last Republican president who was a lawyer? Gerald Ford, who left office 31 years ago and who barely won the Republican nomination as a sitting president, running against Ronald Reagan in 1976. The Republican Party is made up of real people doing real work, who are often the targets of lawyers.
The Democrat Party is made up of lawyers. Democrats mock and scorn men who create wealth, like Bush and Cheney, or who heal the sick, like Frist, or who immerse themselves in history, like Gingrich.
The Lawyers’ Party sees these sorts of people, who provide goods and services that people want, as the enemies of America . And, so we have seen the procession of official enemies, in the eyes of the Lawyers’ Party, grow.
Against whom do Hillary and Obama rail? Pharmaceutical companies, oil companies, hospitals, manufacturers, fast food restaurant chains, large retail businesses, bankers, and anyone producing anything of value in our nation.
This is the natural consequence of viewing everything through the eyes of lawyers. Lawyers solve problems by successfully representing their clients, in this case the American people. Lawyers seek to have new laws passed, they seek to win lawsuits, they press appellate courts to overturn precedent, and lawyers always parse language to favor their side.
**You can read the rest at The American Energy Crisis

The general flaw in the honour system for blood

Monday, October 5th, 2009


Remember how we’re all supposed to be our own worst critics? Apparently it doesn’t apply to donating blood tainted with syphilis:

Kyle Freeman, 36, relied on his own self-assessment that he wasn’t infected with any sexually transmitted diseases when he lied about having sex with men on a donor-screening questionnaire in June that year, said Sally Gomery, the lawyer for Canadian Blood Services.

Yes, Sally is the daughter of John Gomery, former investigator into the sponsorship scandal that likely ended the Liberal Government rule–provided the Canadian population was even paying attention to the scandal.

If their outrage over tainted blood was on the wane already, this new issue might have a finding of a new human right–the ability to be able to infect your fellow man. Freeman is making the argument that because he’s gay, he should not be discriminated against. But how does his testing positive for syphilis bolster his case?

Freeman is suing the agency, claiming he didn’t answer the question truthfully because Canadian Blood Services violated his Charter right to equality regardless of his sexual orientation when it asked him whether he had ever had sex with other men, even once, since 1977.

Believe it or not, Freeman is suing to receive $250,000 in damages. That’s an interesting twist on victimhood–even when gay men are possibly contaminating the blood supply, they are the ones affected. Sally Gomery rightly argues that “[w]hat that individual cannot do is take the law into their own hands.” Freeman obviously had a defiant streak about him, donating blood eighteen times in a span of thirteen years and with full knowledge of his being gay that he would have instantly been rejected. Freeman even stated that he had given blood in 2002 merely as a “political statement.”

The AIDS Committee of Toronto reveal that men who engage in homosexual sex are nearly 40% of all HIV cases in Canada in 2006, up from over 36% in 2001. So not only are the number of new cases climbing, but the proportion of men engaging in homosexual acts are increasing the number of cases. The victimhood mentality has to cease until these numbers can be reconciled. Homosexuals also have to acknowledge their responsibilities in this problem, which when the original self-screening was left in place, we had to have the Krever Inquiry.

I myself was rejected for blood transfusion–for visitng Mexico. I apparently was working in what could be considered a malaria zone, which would make me ineligible for a full year. Rather than demanding a special inquiry or claiming my human rights were violated, I simply acquiesced. The safety of people were more important than my feelings.

Freeman confessed to committing endangering the lives of Canadians with his open defiance of the law. For him to dress it up in the name of liberty is simply an act of biological sabotage.

Careful! Teddy bears are watching

Wednesday, January 7th, 2009

Seems you can’t trust anything these days. A little girl’s teddy bear is now the subject of a custody spying lawsuit:

The lawsuit filed last week in U.S. District Court in Omaha claims Dianna Divingnzzo and her father, Sam Divingnzzo, tried to use the audio recorded by the toy in the divorced couple’s custody case.

How ugly is this case? The defendants’ former divorce lawyers are also named in the suit. Even the lawyers are getting sued in this one. Many of Lewton’s neighbour and cousin joined in as co-plaintiffs, claiming they had had their rights violated as well. Lewton has had private detectives following him, as well as GPS tracking devices attched to his car.

The ACLU will undoubtedly be intervening, but only after Ms. Divingnzzo is recruited by the CIA and is chasing down the next Lackawanna Six.

Woman Sues Doctor For Telling Her To Shut It

Wednesday, December 17th, 2008

A Chicago woman has launched a civil suit against her doctor, claiming that he reprimanded her, told her to shut her pie-hole, and didn’t administer pain medication before she gave birth:

The lawsuit alleged that Pierce showed up at Rush four hours later, and when he did, he allegedly reprimanded Skol for not calling before coming in. The lawsuit claims he said there was not enough time to administer pain medication.

The suit also accuses Pierce of telling a nurse that Skol got the pain she deserved because she had not called ahead.

“Sometimes pain is the best teacher,” he allegedly said.

Skol says the doctor gave her an excruciating vaginal exam in the middle of a contraction. Then, although she was not fully dilated, she claims Pierce instructed her to start pushing.

When Skol or the staff questioned his methods, Pierce told Skol, “Shut up, close your mouth, and push,” according to the suit.

Skol accuses the doctor of giving her unnecessary stitches after the birth, using an excessively large needle.

Considering that was her fifth child, adding a few stitches is probably not a bad idea. The doctor should have even considered some barb wire, at the very least he should have padlocked that bad bastard shut for a spell.

I really can’t blame the doctor for trying to shut the woman up. I haven’t even heard her talk and I want her to shut her face. Let’s face it, woman need to quiet the hell down when giving birth, it’s annoying having to listen to it. I go to the hospital maternity ward every Saturday night to watch the various women give birth, I bring down a few Oh Henry bars and a can or two of Vanilla Coke, and some of the screaming and moaning I hear nearly makes me lose my appetite. One time I heard a woman yell so loud I nearly dropped my Pizza Pocket.

A little huffin’ and puffin’ is not a bad thing, in context it’s even quite sexy, but yelling really loud is pure overkill. You would think will all the drama that they got a bad paper-cut, or stubbed a toe.

I suppose what I’m saying is that if the shouting and screaming doesn’t stop, I’m going to find somewhere else to spend my Saturday nights.

You were a beautiful baby