If you’ve been experiencing bouts of breathing lately and have had a regular heartbeat, you probably heard that shitlibs and their bought-and-paid-for Luegenpresse are simply OUTRAGED at the “fake news” they claim is coming out of Russia and other places where, ahhhh, fake news comes from. It’s so bad that shitlibers say the only reason Donald Trump won the election is because dumb asshole hickneck racist homo-hating normie hetero’s fell for these insane
commie Nazi lies, because.
If this is true, and that Russian media outlets have been lying to the American public, then The Mayor is firmly on the side of the shitlibers, and believes the election is a fraud and the results must be overturned.
It’s just not fair that Russian media outlets lied. How on earth are people NOT going to believe Russian media lies? The Russian media have always been known for their straight-shooting truth telling, and for them to all of a sudden turn around and start to lie – well golly gee that isn’t fair now, is it?
There was a time not long ago – before the fall of the Soviet Union – when shitlibers LOVED all things commie. Whatever Pravda printed, you would hear the leftists trumpet verbatim. If Leonid Brezhnev said Russian citizens ate too much, Western shitlibs would tell you commie people’s were fat. If Nikita Khrushchev said Russian men had three testicles, Western manlets would agree and tell you it’s true because they experienced first hand having had Russian testicles parked on their chins on a regular basis. Now though? Not so much. Sure, shitlib manlets still allow commie testicles to get a free ride on their flat chins, but not Russian commies, because now Russian’s are no longer commie’s, they’re fascists. Or something like that.
You see, the American press doesn’t lie. They are incapable of lying. Shitlibs don’t lie, they don’t even know how to. The DNC can’t lie because. And Hillary Clinton certainly doesn’t lie and if you think she does/did, then you sir/madam are terribly mistaken. Therefore, how on earth could Donald Fucking Trump win the election if the leftist side of the political sphere doesn’t/can’t lie, and Hillary was the most perfect candidate, like ever?
The Russian lie machine, that’s what.
American’s obviously have never been lied to before and when they heard these terrible Russian lies, they pretty much had no choice but to believe them because they thought lies were truth. It makes sense. Obviously. Oh, and plus American Conservative’s are racist and hate women and fags.
Now comes the part where The Mayor is calling for a little favour from you. Stop yer lying. Especially if you’re part of Russian media. Just stop. You’re messing everything up. We can’t tell truth from lies and your brand of lies are so good that it is impossible for us to distinguish them from the truth. The Mayor feels like barfing right now. He feels like barfing up all those Russian lies, barfing them onto a plate, finding the lying liar who spread the lies, and totally pie-face him/her.
So, to recap – we’re stupid as a pound of shit and can’t tell the truth from lies, so if you can help it, only tell us the truth. Because we’re stupid. Opps, already mentioned that. That was stupid.