Archive for the ‘Little Linkie Love’ Category

Little Linkie Love

Wednesday, August 13th, 2008

The medal haul at the Beijing Olympics continues for Canada today, as now we find ourselves just behind Togo, with a combined total of zero medals. To be honest, I’m not in the least upset, or surprised, I’m just digging the commentary by our media here in the great white north. “Yes Bob, even though Simmons placed 32, he just set a Canadian record and a personal best, he will be very happy at his accomplishment.” Rah rah rah!

Congratulations to the first woman ever to win the world hog call contest. Olympics be damned, we have the real deal right here.

Some people really dig the goth look in a woman. This just may change your mind.

For those of you gentlemen that are are sporting, or want to sport a goatee, you will find the Goatee Saver to be very beneficial to your facial hair needs.

As far as mix and mashes are concerned, Movin’ on Up, by Hitler ranks among one the best. The editing makes this fly.

And speaking of great editing jobs, Barack (pbuh)Rick-rolled is great. You may have seen this before, but I’m usually late to the party.

Little Linkie Love

Tuesday, August 12th, 2008

I’ve been watching the Olympics since it started, what a freakin’ great time. However, as with every Olympics, and with being a Canadian, around this time comes the inevitable question from the media: Why is Canada doing so shitty? And then we have the inevitable answer: The athletes are not being given enough funding from the government. Today, our 6th place finisher in kayaking, David Ford, expressed his outrage, saying that if he had more funding he would have been able to perform much better. David, the bronze medal went to a guy from Togo. You lost to a guy from Togo. Yes, a fella from the power-house of Togo beat you, David Ford. In my opinion, if you can’t beat a guy from Togo, there is no amount of funding that is going to help you. David Ford is lucky we don’t clean out his bank account and punch his dog in the face. Yes, I said Togo. I’m curious as to how much government funding the Togonian gets.

If you think that pictures of a wild deer attack on a cafe in Italy would be cool to see, then you are dead-on correct.

Type in a message, wait for a few minutes, and your message will appear live on some sort of board for the whole world to see. The best part is your message can be as disgusting as you want it to be.

If you were ever wondering why Manny Ramirez was turfed from the Bosox, this play should answer that question nicely.

Mountain climbers should stick to mountain climbing and let people who are less retarded do the golfing. You’ll see what I mean.

For some odd reason, I found this tubby guy quite amusing. Maybe it’s the booze talking, but buddy is okay with The Mayor.

Little Linkie Love

Tuesday, August 5th, 2008

I heard an ad on the radio today for Coffee Time, where the announcer lady was telling the general public about the new breakfast egg-muffin jobby it’s offering. She said, “the new Egg whatever it’s called, has one full egg!” I thought, one *full* egg? Does McDonald’s only offer 1/7th of an egg on its McMuffin? Are breakfast places not giving us a full egg? Plus, I have never heard of an egg described as one *full* egg. I’ve heard one whole egg, but never a full egg. Are breakfast places giving away empty eggs? Does this post sound like a Jerry Seinfeld routine? What’s the deal with full eggs? Thank you, I’ll be here all night. Critic.

What I like most about the reaction of Judge Judy to the earthquake last week, is her complete disregard toward the audience that came to see her. Wow, the earth really does revolve around that crunk-eyed bitch.

Judge Penny, well she’s another case altogether. First off, who the hell is Judge Penny? The best part about the reaction to last weeks quake is the look of terror on the faces of the citizens in the crowd. It’s the same look someone would give Judge Penny if they caught her naked coming out of the shower.

The alternative ending to The Dark Knight makes sense to me. The real Dark Knight was great, minus Christian Bales stupid and annoying voice, but the alternative ending puts everything into perspective. Into perspective about what, I’m not sure, but look how fast I can type without stopping!

I feel sorry for the kid that gets mowed over by a giant ball. Not because he gets creamed by a giant ball, but because he’s a fashion mess.

I’m warning you that you will get grossed, and possibly freaked out, by this short clip. However, if you find nothing repulsive about an old kid still breast feeding, then wow, chills up your penis dude, you have found the clip you have dreamt about since your momma got you off her nipple. About 3 months ago I would think.

BTW–the Spell Check word for McMuffin is McMahon

Little Linkie Love

Wednesday, July 30th, 2008

There is a suppose to be a major thunderstorm tonight with tons of rain and winds upwards of 90 kmh, or about 55 mph. Truth be told, I love storms, I eat them up. I love the idea that everything I own could be destroyed by the wrath of God in mere minutes. That kind of living on the edge thing really grips me. When the news crew come by tomorrow and ask me how I am coping, I’ll be the first guy in history not to break down, but tell them in a big, booming, happy voice, “Shit is okay by me”. Yup, you can take my possessions, oh mighty storm, but you can’t break my will. Fag.

In case you missed the video of the NY cop decking the bicyclist, here it is in all its glory.

Saw V is due out Halloween night, and if you care for the trailer, which isn’t very good at all, you can follow this here link.

If you are due for a road trip or are going camping or whatever, 10 Multi-Use Items You Should Consider Packing may very well be a good page for your perusal. Noticeable absent in the list is a 24 pack of Red Bull. Freakin’ amateurs.

If you have any intention of working out alone, and I don’t mean working out on a bag on Doritos and a 6 pack of Bud alone, then this page will help get you started. Good luck, Hercules.

In the history of balloon launches, this one certainly qualifies as the most entertaining.

Little Linkie Love

Friday, July 25th, 2008

A little while ago, Tiger Woods was yapping away at some news scrum or whatever, when he made a comment that he doesn’t watch hockey because it’s boring. You can imagine how well that played here in Canada. He could have been caught setting puppy dogs on fire and he would have been excused, but saying hockey is boring, uh uh, that doesn’t go down well with the average Canadian. I’m under the thought that anyone that plays golf should not be allowed, by law perhaps, to say that any other sport in the universe is boring. Maybe it’s because Tiger is always surrounded by an adoring media and fans that he isn’t grounded in reality, but he should note that golf is slightly more exciting than watching a professional fishing tourney or a curling bonspiel. In other words, shut up Tiger.

This is kind of funny–a hostess for a shopping channel looks like she forgets to breathe, which leads to her dying. Wait, that’s not right, she never dies, but for the grace of God…

The evolution of Barry Bonds is interesting on a few levels. Watching him get bigger every few years is neat, but checking out his yearly totals is what I thought was most interesting. Even before he started taking steroids, and you’ll see exactly what year, he was a pretty great baseball player.

The Top 10 Ugliest Cars Currently Sold In The US is a title which is far too long. The ugly part of the equation is purely subjective, but yet it is still a good list. Either that or I’m feeling generous today.

If you are a regular Mitchievillian, you’ll know that The Mayor loves panoramic pages. This is no exception. After panning up and down, left and right, I had a hankering to eat my keyboard. Which I did.

I was just telling my imaginary friend that what the world needs is a web page that lists all the accidents and fatalities of all the major theme parks around the US. I feel so lucky when my wishes bloom like a little flower.

Little Linkie Love

Tuesday, July 15th, 2008

I was looking around Gizmodo today, seeing if they had any posts on the new IPhone (and by golly they did! About 500 posts to be exact), when I sauntered across this article about how the major electronic manufacturers are going to be lowering the prices for their LCD TV’s in the next few weeks. If you’re in the market for an LCD, hold off for a few weeks, some of the deals are going to be amazing. I’m telling you this instead of telling you a witty story because something like this may be of importance in your life right now. My humour can wait, deals and news of deals must be told right now. That’s the way I rock, and that’s the way I roll. Oh ya, and Starbucks has buck coffee now. Yip yip yippee!

Going through life driving like this is no way to live.

By now, most of you know who Bansky is. Before yesterday, no one knew what he/she looked like…now his identity has been revealed.

The spread of Wal-Mart over the years has been nothing short of incredible. Now you can watch the spread, like a dirty virus, through the magic of Flash animation. This is something that is pretty cool, you should invest the 2 minutes it takes to watch it.

I’ll give anyone $6 if they can watch 1 minute of this guy and not want to punch him in the throat.

If you have a minute to spare and you like short rock and or roll quizzes, this should set you up rather nicely.

Little Linkie Love

Wednesday, July 9th, 2008

That’s a pretty freaky shirt the girl in the picture has on. It’s lucky for her that she hasn’t been grabbed, thrown in a van, taken to a secluded spot and thrown into a fire while an angry crowd calls her a witch. Let’s face it, she’s full of demons, her shirt is satanic, she very well may be the devil. For the sake of survival, if you do happen upon her, feel free to set her ablaze.

UNESCO, that little commie offshoot of the UN, has designated another 8 or 10 or whatever more areas world Cultural Heritage areas. UNESCO has some pictures, some information, a little this and that and the other. Go have a look at what your money is doing.

If I ever get sick, please do not send me to this hospital.

Most new fashion that I see I thoroughly detest. However, this bikini is the exception.

At first, I thought this video of a guy sucking back salvia and driving was going to be funny. By the end of the short clip, I wanted to grab him by the scruff of his neck and throttle him. For no reason, he’s just a guy I’d like to see pounded out.

If I had my way, I would give this dog a high-end government position. Yes, he’s that smart. You’re a good boy!

Little Linkie Love

Tuesday, July 8th, 2008

I’m dying to tell you the details of a new contest I will be running in Mitchieville starting this Thursday, but I have to keep everything under wraps until tomorrow. I will tell you this though: The prizes are rather weak, the fun factor will be tremendous, and the contest involves Nancy. Yup, Nancy, our little friend from Naples.

I know, you are positively BUSTING out of your Calvin’s trying to figure out what the hell is going on. Sorry, me no tell you nutting until tomorrow. Okay, I will tell you one thing: Show up tomorrow night for the details and prepare to urinate in your dungarees with excitement.

If you ever need to hide an elephant but lack the brain power to figure out how to pull it off, this will certainly help you.

Neatorama hooked me up to an excellent site today called Capital Words. Here’s how it is described, via Neatorama: “Capitol Words is a simple website that displays the word that was most often used in the congressional record that day. Even more interesting, it apparently has archives for this dating back through the last eight years.”

Drag your mouse across the screen and hold the left button down. This will give you a good indication as to what Fatal Flesh is all about.

Great Moments in History made by the artist tool called an *Etch a Sketch* is most interesting and deserves a boo.

Sure, cockpit is a funny word and always makes me giggle. However, 10 Spectacular Cockpit Photos is bordering on very good with the potential of being excellent. Don’t get me wrong, it isn’t excellent at all, but it’s not too bad.

Little Linkie Love

Monday, July 7th, 2008

TLDG and I had a lawn sale last Saturday. After the sale was over, we had a bunch of useless crap left over that we were stuck with. Instead of taking it all down to the creek and throwing it in the water, TLDG told me to put it out by the curb and stick a big *FREE* sign on all the junk. So I did, thinking to myself that there isn’t a hope in hell that anyone is going to up and take our crap. Sure enough, within a few hours, some degenerate grabbed the whole pile of shit and carted it away. To say I was amazed is an understatement. To say that it was the most spectacular thing I have ever witnessed is an exaggeration. To say that I was blown-away is just about right. Thank God for the poor and the whole recycling nonsense.

“In Canada, apparently, you’re allowed to have your own political values, as a parent, but you’re not allowed to teach those values to your children unless those political values are “approved”‘. Richard Evans has a very important post up that you really should read.

Do you know what my favourite kind of cake is? Yellowcake. I mean, if it even exists. But it doesn’t because Saddam had no nuclear program. Hey, media…shhhhhhhhhhhh. Thanks Mark!

I thought that Tooth Art would be a tad sexier than what it turned out to be. Amusing? Yes. Sexy? not so much.

Two Dogs has a new site up and I suggest that you make your way over there, read a bunch of posts, bookmark it, go back every day and fill your head with Obama knowledge. Good luck on the new site, Two dogs, you have a winner there.

Prepare to soil thyself. Living on the Edge: 2 stunningly scary clifftop communities will make you say things like *wow* and *cool*. Yes, it’s THAT freaky.

Little Linkie Love

Thursday, July 3rd, 2008

My youngest legitimate son was telling me tonight that he has been thinking lately what he would do and how he would feel if I passed away. He told me that he would be very lost and sad. However, if I did pass away, he hoped I would die in a motorcycle accident as his friends would think it awesome that his old man died in a bike fatality. Children are a treasure, it’s time to start burying some of them.

If you feel that useless websites are clogging up the web, then you will probably want to take a pass on this one. I, on the other hand, find it strangely amusing.

If I have posted 57 Useful Google Tools before, then I apologize. If I haven’t posted this before, then welcome to 57 things you will never use.

Forgotten Medical Cures is a fantastic site that gets the highest of recommends. I was on this site for about an hour yesterday, remembering many of the cures granny and ma use to administer to my family. And then I started to cry as my repressed memories bubbled to the surface.

FINVIZ is perhaps the best stock market quote page on the interwebs. I keep this thing running all the time, it’s an invaluable source to me. I just know that one day, my 5 million shares of Bre-X are going to skyrocket.

The Origins of 10 of Your Favorite Muppets made me think that I’m not even sure if I have one favourite Muppet. Was Drunken Louse a Muppet? Or was that my uncle. Either way, I’m drinking a bucket of whiskey tonight.

Little Linkie Love

Wednesday, July 2nd, 2008

If anyone is following the divorce trial between Christie Brinkley and husband Peter Cook, I’m sure you will agree that it is absolutely fascinating. Testifying today, Diana Bianchi, the 18 year old that Cook was banging, said that he paid her $300,000 to shut her pie-hole and a generous stipend of $3000.00 a month to polish his knob. The thing that really caught my attention though was this choice tidbit:

He acknowledged spending about $3,000 a month on pornographic Web sites in 2005.

Hey, poopy pants, internet porn is free, keep up with the tour. If you don’t believe me, ask Steamboat, he’ll hook you up, you rich retard.

I never knew this, but the dead dude who use to own Wendy’s–Dave, I believe–use to have terrible trouble with his daughter. She use to attack him and try to smash his head open with blunt objects. It’s true, follow the linkie to find out.

I’m not sure what to make out of Web Guy vs Sales Dude. I’m pretty sure I hate it, but the jury is still out for now.

What better way to introduce your children into the exciting world of subatomic particles, than by giving them a Subatomic Particle Plush Toy. Hooray science!

If you are going to corrupt your mind with utter nonsense and crap, may I suggest making this your first stop. Dmitri, the studstalker, is one of the funniest things I have heard in a long time. The sad part is that both calls are real. Ya.

What are the most unhealthy carnival foods? If I told you it would ruin the surprise. On the other hand, a deep fried Snickers bar sounds pretty good right now.

As usual, Pseudonym is up-to-date with all the relevant links each and every day. Have a peak and check back often, the man delivers.

Little Linkie Love

Tuesday, July 1st, 2008

I should have saved this picture for Mugshot day, but something so fresh and beautiful like this should be shared immediately with the world. Hey, no problem, you’re welcome. Seriously, don’t mention it. Wow, enough already, you’re embarrassing me–I said it’s no problem.

If you’re wondering if my Dominion Day was good, the answer is yes. It’s odd having a Tuesday off and having to go back to work at City Hall for three days, but that’s the way it is–it is what it is, as the smelly, filthy hippy scum would say. I made the best of Dominion Day–I traded in two of my yellow privilege tokens and had not one, but two cups of Victory Coffee. Both cups were equally delicious. Tonight I will be attending the annual fireworks display at the Monty Hall Pavilion in downtown Mitchieville. Man, it’s going to be great.

As far as useless sites are concerned, it would be hard to be more uselesser that this. That’s right, I said more uselesser.

Currently under construction, the Oasis of the Seas will be the largest luxury ship when completed. The rendering of this ship are extraordinary, mind-boggling really.

Build Your Own Star is an interesting site where you build your own star. That’s correct, it’s self-explanatory. I didn’t bother building my own star, I already have a closet full of them and truth be told, they take up far too much space.

I have never seen a soccer game in my life. I won $300 the other day when I picked Spain to win the Euro, but it was a fluke, and I never managed to invest even 1 second into watching any of the games. Having said that, this guy has some serious soccer skills and is kind of funny to boot.

Brazilians always yammer on about how hot their women are. Granted, some of them are cute, but I’m not the type of guy who likes their girlie to have an ass the size of a small planet. Notwithstanding, have a boo at these sand sculptures of women. Funnily enough, they are penis pleasing.