Archive for the ‘People that make out with animals’ Category
It looks bad from here, but let’s go to the end and and rewind.
If that ticket is taken to court, surely they will throw it out. So that’s one bad thing down. The insurance will cover the damage, so that’s two things down. Finally, well placed punches to the face and neck, combined with roundhouse kicks to the gut and head will wipe the smile off Gerhart’s mug. A flaming Moe thrown threw his kitchen window will shut his whole family up.
The Mayor is a problem solver, that much is obvious.
That sheep sure has that “Oh no, not again” look to it. Ewe betcha he does.
I suppose of all the pictures I’ve posted this week of People That Make Out With Animals, this one has to be the most disgusting. Although, it seems Kelli Carpenter has finally come to her senses and gotten rid of the heifer in the giant blue tarpaulin on the right that you see. Yup, Kelli and her barnyard lover have broken up. And that made me think – why do bad things always happen to good people?
Hopefully Kelli can one day recover and find someone equally as dumpy, annoying, and shrill as that drippy yard mule Rosie O’Donnell. And hopefully Rosie will one day recover and get hit by a bus. Yes, I know the last sentence was a little offside, but believe me when I say I don’t wish that on any bus.
While it might look like Corey is getting a gentle peck on the face by this lovely bear, if you look a little closer you will see that the bear is actually gnawing Corey’s face off. And I think that’s what makes this picture extra funny. Like, America’s Home Video $10,000 winner funny. I guess Corey is going to have to *face up* to the fact that he’s only a neck and body now. Haha, keep your *chin up* Corey. Ha! Why the *long face* Corey? Bear *get your tongue* Corey?
Okay, now you’ve gone too far. You’ve hurt Corey’s feelings.
For those of you that go to Andy’s blog, you are probably familiar with this picture of Andy and his dog Sadie. When I started the theme for this week, I had no intention of actually showing pictures of people in compromising positions with their animal(s), after all, Homey don’t play dat, and besides, I’m not a freak. My intention was to show heartwarming pictures like this one. See what Andy is doing in the picture? Ya, he’s showing his dog love through a gentle kiss to the side of her head. Andy’s tongue is nowhere near the dogs mouth. And although I can’t be 100% certain, Andy’s right hand is probably on the ground, or perhaps on the dogs back. It’s not on her ass if that’s what you’re thinking. Yup, I’m pretty sure his hand is not on that dogs ass. At least 75% certain. And if you went to school, 75% would be a B. And folks, that’s aint half bad.
Although there were a few folk that told The Mayor they thought People That Make Out With Animals Week was hitting the bottom of the barrel, it really surprised me how many people emailed to say they thought it was actually a wonderful idea. I even had a half dozen people email me, asking if there was any protocol, any code or convention when it comes to making out with animals. Well, since The Mayor doesn’t judge, criticize or condemn, I promised these folks I would try to find them a picture that would outline the proper procedure to help them in their beastie quest.
So, to all you liberals who asked The Mayor for help, here is your picture.
I’m glad I could be of service.
I heard this is how Swine Flu™ started. Some cute idiot from Mexico was feeling rather amorous one night and looked over into the mud and saw that Porky was looking rather attractive. Next thing you know, Egypt is culling pigs and New York State is mandating its nurses to get H1N1 shot. Badda bing badda boom.
I truly hope we never have to deal with Doggie Flu, what a disaster that would be.