You know what The Mayor likes the most about this guys shrapnel face? Nothing.
Then again, when it comes right down to it, The Mayor has a soft heart. I mean, tomorrow morning when I have to travel into the City of Light in order to endorse George Smitherman for Mayor (he’s gay, adopted a child, ripped off e-health for a cool 1 billion, and was a crystal meth addict – but the Red Star says he has charisma and is what the city needs, while his main competitor is a big fat meanie Conservative) I’m sure shrapnel face will approach my SUV with squeegee in hand, and being the nice guy I am, I’ll wave him away from my cool ride, but still toss him a handful of pennies as I drive over his stupid foot.
There is no limit to my generosity, and that certainly is a contributing factor as to why I have received many citations and awards over my illustrious career.