Archive for the ‘Silicone face’ Category

October Is Pretty Great

Tuesday, October 12th, 2010

Man, October is a bit of a braggart, eh? Like, settle down, October, or I’ll have the best month – November – come over there and kick yer teeth in.

Oh Kadeisha!

Wednesday, June 16th, 2010

I’m not sure if Kadeisha was giving or receiving the hair weave, although I’m also not entirely sure that’s the main point The Mayor should be making in this post.

I will say though that I’m a little less confident in our future than I was 10 minutes ago.

Silicone Face Week–Friday Edition

Friday, January 30th, 2009

The thing that really gets me about the pictures I have put up during Silicone Face Week, is if these pictures are the end result of what silicone injections, lipo, and facial reconstruction have accomplished, what in God’s name did these dirty napkins look like before they got all that work?

Strike that, I don’t want to know.

This ends Silicone Face Week. Thank the Lord.

Silicone Face Week–Thursday Edition

Thursday, January 29th, 2009

If you take this picture of silicone face and put it into a program that can crop pictures, shrink the picture to about 1/5 of the size, then hit rotate, you know what you have? If you can’t figure out what I’m saying, look at the picture. Now, turn your head 90 degrees. What do you see? Oh for the love of God, I’m making a vagina lip joke, keep up with the tour.

Silicone Face Week–Wednesday Edition

Wednesday, January 28th, 2009

The best line to come out of Silicone Face Week has to be the Godless Commies remark regarding yesterday’s creature feature of a woman:

Maybe I’m old-fashioned, but somehow the idea of having two of Goodyear’s fleet of blimps grafted onto your face doesn’t strike me as particularly cool.

Or smart. If the tie-down rope lets go, the folks at air traffic control are gonna be really upset.

I have, not including tonight because it won’t happen, two days to come up with a better line than that for my description of these raggedy hags, and I have a sneaking suspicion that just aint gonna happen.

Godless Commie, I salute you.

Silicone Face Week–Tuesday Edition

Tuesday, January 27th, 2009

I’m a big fan of the saying that the Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away. In the case of this woman, the Lord gave her pretty eyes, but then when it came to her lips, he kept giving and giving and giving and giving. The only thing he took away was her looks and probably her will to survive. He also took away my appetite when he knowingly let me open the file to this picture.

I would have thought that the machine that dispenses silicone into the lips of creatures like this would have an automatic mechanism that would automatically shut it off when it hits 45 psi. I suppose I’m wrong. It won’t be the last time.

Silicone Face Week–Monday Edition

Monday, January 26th, 2009

Since it’s not cricket to wish death upon someone, I suppose I’ll just pass on any comment for this post.