Archive for the ‘Someone will pick that up’ Category
I’m sure most of you are looking at garbage road and thinking it’s little more that a disgusting heap of smelly rubbish. That’s not how The Mayor sees it, oh no.
The Mayor sees opportunity. The Mayor sees success. The Mayor sees a fortune.
We are told that children are our future. We all know that’s a lie. Children are useless. They will make useless adults, just as we make useless adults, just as our parents made useless adults, rinse and repeat. Plastic bags are our future. To deny this is to do so at your folly.
A mere plastic bag is now worth 5 cents at any and all grocery stores in Ontario. And there are thousands, if not billions of grocery stores in Ontario. Now look at that picture again – are you thinking what I’m thinking? Exactly. Let’s get the folks who are on welfare to collect those dirty plastic bags, and sell them in front of grocery stores, or to grocery stores directly, for 3 – 5 cents each. We’ll clean up. that may have been a pun. Except, I don’t know what a pun is.
Look at the tens of thousands of plastic bags out there. There has to be a million of them. Probably more. If you could look into The Mayor’s eyes right now you would see dollar signs flashing.
It’s no secret that welfare peoples are lazy, shiftless, no good layabouts. That’s a fact. It’s probably in the Bible. Maybe in the Corinthian’s. By decree, I’m sure The Mayor could arrange mandatory work-farms for welfare peoples. If the welfarians refuse to work, they will be denied their beer drinking/smoke smoking/drug using cheque at the end of each month. 10 hours a day is all I ask. Think of the children.
This is a good idea and you and I both know it. Now let’s implement it.
Fenris – I’d like to see you in my office in one hour, we got a lot of work to do!
The second thing I say to myself when I see a picture like this is, “the biological balance of that delicate ecosystem has been disturbed and the nitrogen cycle has to get established again.” The first thing I say when I see a picture like that is, “check out the lugans fishing, what are they trying to catch, leukemia?”
Maybe their water source isn’t dirty per se, maybe it’s just muddy. And maybe the two lugans are trying to catch beta fish. And maybe The Mayor will wake up tomorrow morning sporting a British accent, and his houseboy Cheeves will explain how The Mayor is actually a billionaire and lives in a castle that is made of gold. Maybe. Just maybe.
All these things are possible, if you only just believe.
I believe it was a Barney song that said, “I love swimming with my friends in syringe filled waaaaaaaaters. I love stepping on maxi-pads on the beeeeeeeeeach. I love egg shells and banana peels that stick to my foooooorehead. I love when your trash is within my reeeeeeeach.”
Play in the water, play in the water, play in the water before the tide goes out.
So you had a rough week at work. Somebody, and I’m not saying who, but somebody did not strap down the containment units properly.
It’s okay, comrade. You’re in a union. And you know what? Dumping several thousand tonnes of goods into the Atlantic Ocean is a mistake that can happen to anyone.
So rest easy. There will still be a pay cheque for you on Monday, brother, and a pay cheque for every Monday after this one. For we are the union. Together we stand, and divided we fall. Not unlike those containment units fell into the Atlantic Ocean.
Download this picture and have a boo at it the next time someone tells you how great China’s doing. You may also want to keep this link in your favourites, to pull out the next time some idjit starts spouting off what an economic paradise the commies have turned China into. Water pollution in 2007 was more than twice as severe as was shown in official figures that had long omitted agricultural waste. Nearly EVERY waterway is infested with effluent from pesticides and fertilizers from farms, human waste, poisons from businesses and runoff from landfills. Don’t worry though, we can trust the Chinese to clean that crap up.
When I first saw this picture, I thought someone threw out two perfectly good kids. Then I realized that maybe those kids aren’t that good. I mean, maybe there’s something wrong with them. C’mon, who would throw out two perfectly good kids, it makes no sense?
On the other hand, it looks as if someone threw out a perfectly good husk of corn, and that makes me sick. I hate waste.
I wanted to start a feature called Someone Will Pick That Up, and post pictures of giant messes people made, and then I came across a page that had nothing but pictures of the inside of Detroit schools. I should be good for the next six months now.
However, if you come across any pictures of giant man made messes (alliteration), please send them along to The Mayor. You will be rewarded handsomely.